August 12, 2014--Hungry years

My dad calls them the "hungry years."  These early years of marriage, or maybe just adulthood in general, that, for I'm guessing a lot of people, are rough.  Especially financially.

I talked to my dad not long ago on the phone and during our chat we discussed some of the financial struggles that my husband and I are going through right now and the little tricks we're using to get by.  My dad just chuckled and said something along the lines of, "Yup, I remember those days all too well."  Those days of living paycheck to paycheck.  Of robbing Peter to pay Paul.  Of choosing this bill over that bill and hoping that things work out in the end, hoping to somehow catch a break.

But my dad also said something that I've been thinking about a lot.  He said that as rough as these times can seem right now, when we look back on them in twenty years, chances are we'll remember them fondly and say, "You know, those times really weren't so bad."  And I think he's right.

People who know me know that I am a very firm believer in God's plan for me.  I never hesitate to say that things happen for a reason and God may be the only one to know that reason right now, but that's enough for me.  Whenever I think things are simply beyond bad, something always happens to prove me wrong, and I know that God is maneuvering my life in the direction He's laid out for me.

It could be said that part of the reason we are struggling financially right now is because we moved to Quincy.  Part of the reason is because Chaz was ill and spent a lot of time in the hospital over a six month period.  Part of the reason is because the job he was working at the time was not supportive of him.  It could be said that part of the reason is because I wasn't working, but instead stayed home with my children.  There are a lot of reasons we are struggling financially, some of which are not within our control and a good many that definitely are.

But the point is, we moved to Quincy and the move was not easy.  Or cheap.  We were blessed enough to have people in our lives that were able and willing to help us move when the opportunity presented itself.  After two months, we are still playing a huge game of catch-up that will probably last long into the foreseeable future.

But we're here and I know that we're here because this is where God wants us.  This is where we need to be.  The pieces would not have fallen into place the way they did if we weren't meant to be here.

We are definitely going through the hungry years right now.  But we also have been blessed with the means to survive them.  I cannot even begin to say thanks for all of the support we have right now.

We have family that is willing to do so much in their own individual ways to get us through this.  Whether it's simply a phone call, a listening, nonjudgmental ear, or the lending of a car, or of actual funds, or most importantly, their prayers--all of it is so appreciated.  To our parents, our brothers and sisters, our aunts and uncles and grandparents.  Thank you.

We have friends that are empathetic and do more than I could ever hope to repay.  Words are not nearly enough to express the gratitude I feel towards the people God has brought into my life.  Friends who babysit for a few hours so I can run to the food bank, friends who donate funds when they are struggling themselves, friends who simply show up.  It's been a very long time since I had those kinds of people in my life and I don't know what I would do without them all.  To all of our friends, near and far.  Thank you.

We have a supportive church family that, even though we are new, is willing to stand up and help.  They offer comfort and solace and support and prayers.  To our pastor and fellow church members.  Thank you.

We have social opportunities that offer us hope for the future.  Good schools for our girls.  Networking for us.  People in the know who are willing to share their knowledge to help me become a successful and earning author.  To the Quincy Writers' Guild, the Quincy Not-So-Fine-Arts Society, Night Shift Fiction Writers, St. James Lutheran School, BCBS of Illinois.  Thank you.

I never cease to be amazed at how even at the darkest times, when stress is a sickening ball in my gut and I just can't see a way out, God provides one.  Something always happens, an answer comes from somewhere, and we survive.  We make it through to the next day, and the next, and the next.

We couldn't do it without you.

So thank you.  Thank you for making these hungry years worthwhile.  Thank you for making these hungry years a time that I will look back on twenty years from now and say, "Yeah, those times really weren't so bad.  Those times were actually pretty damn good."  Thank you for not making me wait twenty years to know that the times aren't so bad...because I already know that we'll make it through.

Thank you.